Brad Fitzpatrick (brad) wrote,
Brad Fitzpatrick

Guitar woes and general bitching

Know how I was fucking with power switches the other day? After discovering my X10 stuff could only switch 300 Watts and my heater was 1500, I used my guitar effects box to test to see if I could even get the heyu package to work. I got it working.

But just now I discovered that my effects box is dead. Won't turn on with any outlet. Did the fucking X10 thing fry it? Grrrr.

So I can tune my guitar manually, slowly, but only with itself. I can't play along to anything.

I have lessons tomorrow and I haven't practiced enough, yet again.

Why do I even go? I don't have time for anything, much less something as frivolous and unimportant as guitar lessons.

I think I'm going to quit.

I should quit everything that I don't put enough effort into. That includes just about everything, even school. But I can't quit school ... I'm so close to being done.

The only thing I put a notable amount of effort into is LiveJournal, but even that's not enough. LiveJournal demands ten times the effort I have available and nobody else seems to care about it as much as I do.

So maybe I should quit that too. I could take my time and dedication to a project (or, company) that I find interesting and help somebody else out.

Lame analogy time.

Ever go white water rafting? It's awesome. But would it be so awesome if only one side of the boat was paddling? Or if only one person on one side of the boat was paddling? Hell, I don't even paddle some days. So LiveJournal is drifting towards a fucking waterfall or rock or something. We need 3-4 people on each side of the boat.

I'm just sick of half-assed everything.

Half-assed me with guitar.
Half-assed me with everything.
Half-assed LiveJournal.

I'm sick of people being unreliable.
I'm sick of me being unreliable.
I'm sick of me relying on other people.

I'm sick of complaining about things not being ideal.

Arrrgh. I can't help it. Things could be cool.

Another example:

I start to learn LaTeX everytime I do my math homework.
I give up everytime, because I actually need to do my math homework.
Because it's always due the next day.
Today I did it a day ahead of time.
But I still didn't learn LaTeX, because I had more important things to do.
So I never learn.

(I'm not turning comments off because generally the 1 intelligent comment in a batch of 20 stupid ones makes it all worthwhile, but please... spare me the damn e-hugs and such.)
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